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Senior Contributor

Are you there Mollie.

I was hoping you might stop riding tandem with your mate, long enough to read this, if you can.

Subject: Moron Test 


Shelby County, Illinois
The Official Moron Test


1. Is there a 4th of July in England? Yes or no?

2. How many birthdays does the average man have?

3. Some months have 31 days. How many have 28?

4. How many outs are there in an inning?

5. Can a man in California marry his widow's sister?

6. Take the number 30, divide it by 1/2, and then add 10. What do you get?

7. There are 3 apples and you take two away. How many apples are you left with?

8. A doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take one every half an hour. How long will the pills last?

9. A farmer has 17 sheep. All but 9 of them die. How many sheep are left?

10. How many animals of each sex did Moses bring with him on the ark?

11. A butcher in the market is 5'10" tall. What does he weigh?

12. How many 2 cent stamps are there in a dozen?

13. What was the President's name in 1960?

Here are the answers:

1. Is there a 4th of July in England? Yes or No?
...Yes. It comes right after the 3rd.

2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
....One (1). You can only be born once.

3. Some months have 31 days. How many have 28?
....Twelve (12). All of them have at least 28 days.

4. How many outs are there in an inning?
... Six (6). Don't forget there is a top and bottom to every inning.

5. Can a man in California marry his widow's sister?
...No. He must be dead if it is his widow.

6. Take the number 30, divide it by 1/2, and then add 10. What do you get?
.... Seventy (70). Thirty (30) divided by 1/2 is 60.

7. There are 3 apples and you take two away. How many apples are you left with?
.Two (2). You take two apples, therefore YOU have TWO apples.

8. A doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take one every half an hour. How long will the pills last?
.....One hour. If you take the first pill at 1:00, the second at 1:30, and the third at 2:00, the pills have run out and only one hour has passed.

9. A farmer has 17 sheep. All but 9 of them die. How many sheep are left?
.... Nine (9). Like I said, all BUT nine die.

10. How many animals of each sex did Moses have on the ark?
..... None. I didn't know that Moses had an ark.

11. A butcher in the market is 5' 10 tall. What does he weigh?
.... Meat ... that is self-explanatory.

12. How many 2 cent stamps are there in a dozen?
..Twelve (12). How many eggs are in a dozen? Twelve. It's a dozen.

13. What was the President's name in 1960?
..Barak Obama. As far as I know, he hasn't changed his name.



So, how did we do?

13 correct.........GENIUS...you are good.

10-12 correct....ABOVE AVERAGE...but don't let it go to your head.

7-9 correct........AVERAGE...but who wants to be average?

4-6 correct..........SLOW...pay attention to the questions!

1-3 correct..........IDIOT...what else can be said?

0 correct......CONGRATULATIONS, you are a certified MORON!
 
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8 Replies
Veteran Advisor

Re: Mistake On the Moron Test

I got all of the questions correct, except the last one.... and that is because I was correct, and the posed question was incorrect.

The question posed was "What was the president's name (assuming that the subject of the question is the American president, and not one from another nation) in 1960??"

The answer is "undetermined" as Barack Obama was not born until the 4th of August, 1961.  The location of which, has not been proven, as of yet. His name has been legally changed, at least once.  He was registered to attend a school in Indonesia under the name of Barry Soetoro.

I guess that I am smarter than the person who thought up the quiz.... , right Colin?

The author of this test must be, at least partially..... , a moron.

Senior Contributor

Re: Mistake On the Moron Test

Craig, I have to say that I got them all right but one.  But you "guessed" you were smarter than the person who thought up the quiz.  I wouldn't guess the knowledge of anyone, including you. 

 

As for the ongoing Obama birth certifcate thing which is quite obviously a scabby old sore, I thought you might have gotten over that rubbish by now.  As I have said before, There is a republican movement to denegrate the man simply because he is black and democrat.  So when we talk about "smart" people, I assume there are people in the bureaucracy with better access to more information than both you and I and smarter than you and I.  They have yet to find anything like what his detractors have been swarming about since he was elected.  The fact remains, he is a legitimate US citizen and  entitled to the president.  All the huffing by you lot has come to absolutely NOTHING.

 

You HAVE to admit your argument for his legitimacy has failed.  If you cannot see that, you ARE a Moron but I don't think you are.  You just can't stand anything democrat and that is your democrat right.  All the best.

Senior Contributor

Re: Mistake On the Moron Test

I do get a chuckle out of your posts Gough.  You say, "But you "guessed" you were smarter than the person who thought up the quiz.  I wouldn't guess the knowledge of anyone, including you.Yet in your original post of this thread you said in your very first sentence "I was hoping you might stop riding tandem with your mate, long enough to read this, if you can."  Then in your follow up post where you say you would never guess the knowledge of anyone by saying "If you can not see that you are a moron but I don't think you are."  I'm guessing you have to be one of the leaders on this site for insulting others intelligence repeatedly  yet in your mind you believe you would never make judgements on other's knowledge.  What a hoot!  You either have a very poor memory or are not a very honest person. 

 

You also continue to buy in to a popular falsehood of many Dems.  "There is a republican movement to denigrate the man simply because he is black and democrat."  While I agree there is movement by many Repubs to denigrate the man because he is a democrat I don't buy the repeated claims that all Repubs or others not supporting Obama are doing so because he is black.   This has become the biggest falsehood surrounding Obama even topping the birther's claims of him not being a legitimate citizen.    Would you not admit there was a movement by Dems to denigrate G. W. Bush?  Do you recall the claims about his cocaine use, the forged papers CBS used in their reporting about Bush being AWOL or the repeated claims about Bush's low IQ ratings which again were supported with fake reports?  The funny thing was that while Bush was not an outstanding student he got better grades then John Kerry who Dems like to portray as being much more intelligent then Bush.  Seems Bush got one D while at Yale while Kerry received 5 with 4 coming in just one year.  Was the movement to denigrate Bush or Reagan done so because they were white or simply because they were Repubs?   I'll admit there are some people out there unhappy that Obama is POTUS simply because he is black but I believe they are in the minority.  It does not matter if the POTUS is white or black, man or woman, or even Mother Teresa the opposing party will still find something or make up something to try and damage them.  

 

 

Senior Advisor

Re: Mistake On the Moron Test

I think there is more than a tinge of the KKK in the teabaggers. I have nothing to document it but I think that is the case.

Senior Contributor

Re: Mistake On the Moron Test

So why bring it up. Another bone head move on your part

Senior Contributor

Re: Mistake On the Moron Test

Dag -  There is no doubt Craig is entitled to his opinion, and rightly so, he is so one eyed on his repig devotion, it leaves no room for anything that Obama does for Craig to acknowledge.  That is why I said "If you can't see that you are a moron" and both of us know he is not. I think a made myself clear in that statement but probably not clear enough for you, for that I apologise.  Never believe I don't make judgements of people, like yourself, and never believe that judgements are not made of me simply because I make judgements of people.  One stark problem here is people somehow think it is inappropriate for a foreigner to have an opinion.  You also know there are a good many idiots on here and you would know them better than I .  To that problem I have to confess I do not tolerate bigoted fools very well. in fact, not at all.  Any one with half a brain can see that some of the posts have originated from a vacuum between their ears. I refute your claim my memory is poor or I am dishonest.  To this assumption of yours I can only relate how you have judged me. Surely you can see that.  That of course leaves me with a more informed judgement of you.

 

Go back to the Craig thing, early on in the peace, I formed an opinion of Craig and it is well known. That is not say I am stupid enough to not believe the man has a brain. Craig and I went head to head over religion and at one time some nutter here was going to get me struck dead, believe it or not.  That cannot be justification for forming a judgement on anyone though, can it.

 

Finally, these talk forums are loaded with Republican voters who feel they own these sites, and nearly everyone is practicing the socially acceptable pastime of following god.  Both of these I am the opposite and that should explain where you and the rest of the religious republicans are coming from and don't insult me by saying that is untrue.  That is another judgement of mine to which you can hardly object.  How is that for a short memory, buddy.

Senior Advisor

Re: Mistake On the Moron Test

You just failed the moron test.

Senior Contributor

Re: Mistake On the Moron Test

Thanks.....means I am not a moron. Where does that leave you?