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Veteran Advisor


I am in trouble this morning!  I got up at 3:30 and groggelly found my way to the bathroom and then went to the Kitchen to get my morning coffee started.  I turn around and see the milk pitcher there so I know I have to go and get milk.  While I am waitng for my coffee to brew I go and look at the table and see a note my better half has left.


Of course it is no love note or thank you for being so sweet no it is my instructions for the morning.

It says and I quote:


Put ham (frig) in sink in AM


Simple enough instructions you know.

So with the aroma of warm coffee brewing in the BUNN and feeling lighter since the trip to the outhouse I says I had better do this before I go check the heifers outside here this morning. So I go to the frig and I look for the ham.

Nothing!  OK well maybe she meant the basement fridge so I walk past the coffee maker which is almost done now and I walk to the basement stairs stepping on three pairs of sneakers and one coat along the way.  I flick on the light then meandor or stumble or fall down those steps constantly being reminded of my bad knee and that it don't like stairs in the morning.

Well Iget to that fridge and I look inside.  HUH no HAM here. so I turn around and go back up the stairs with the constant reminder that miking cows and other injuries have sure taken a toll on that right Knee.


SO I get to the top of the landing and I scratch thinking I am missing something so maybe I better drink that coffee. 

Well it ain't folgers but it woke me up.  SO I think to myself I better reread that note.

Again it says put ham (fridg) in sink in AM

OK know I have read it with coffe and after some exercis so I thinks to myself were the heck is that ham? 

And now I am also getting hungry so I think about it and I says must be in the freezer in the kitchen fridge.   SO I go and look again no ham but the california melody vegetables did fall out and hit my big toe!

So now I go back to the basement thinking maybe it is in that down stairs basement side by side.  Again now I hobble down the stairs aching right knee and hurting left big toe.  I look again NO!  SO I go out to the garage and I look in the chest freezer NO ham!  I mean I moved everything in there but no ham!

SO now I can hear heifers mooing and I think I need  to get out there and check them over and I need to drink my coffe and I haven't had time to check what the SF folks are talking about this morning so I real quick check over here and see that ole BA has posted something and I make a quick response  while I drink down that black go go juice. Then I head out wondering like heck where the heck is that ham?


WEll now just a few minutes ago I get back in the wife walks out of the bedroom in her pink robe and says "did you make coffe?".

I says "yep it's in the kitchen."

She goes in and gets her favorite cup and then I hear her say something like "idiot"or maybe "**bleep** idiot"

OH crap I thinks here it comes and she hasn't even been up for five minutes,

SHe gracefully stomps back to where our computer is and says "can't you follow instructions?"

Well know this is a tricky question to answer becasuse at times I do have a problem with that but I was fairly confident that I had followed all of them this morning. 

SO I says hey I looked all over the place for that dad gum ham and I couldn't find it!  I tried I says but I had to get going and I couldn't keep looking.

SHe says well did you have time to get on that computer this morning?

I said I pead the fifth on that one!

And she says besides it had nothing to do with ham that was the abbreviation for hamburger!

WEll I looks at the note having been up now for thre and half hours and I see that stupid little dot at the end ofthe word ham.  OH crap I says!

so this is what the note actually said put ham. (frig) in sink in AM


Now dear friends Don't you think I have a valid excuse here? 

But alas I think I will be in the dog house now for a while! 

BUt yesterday was a good ay in the marketys we moved up 41 cents in the NOV. class 3 price and almost every other month hit new life of contract highs. 

WHy cause all the commodities moved higher no other reason than that.

BE safe anybody hungrey for ham?

Well we won't have any ot our house I know I checked all over and there is none to be had!  but at this rate I may not be eating here either! Be safe JR

3 Replies
Frequent Contributor

Re: 10-21

It goes on that way all the time here. Thanks! I know I'm not the only one doing battle in the mornings. Just rying to do everything right and stay out of the firing range is a job in itself. I made a doctors appointment for 10:00 Am next week. I was of the thinking that just telling her was good enough. Oh no, she proceeds to tell me to  inform her first and try to make it in the afternoon. Now this is a apt. concerning a double lung implant but oh no I have to be informed of what and why and when the apt shoul be made. Oh life is grand! I think the corn market is tiring here too. strong dollar today grains down maybe a sell offf in th offing

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Veteran Advisor

Re: 10-21

Kinsman as the great prophet red green says "I am pulling for ya!  We're all in this together"

Hope all goes well with your doctors appt. 

Had my wife read that post.  She laughed out loud and said at least there is one brave soul who will admitt to a real marriage.  She said I shoulda woke her up and asked her what the note meant!  Yea right that would have been a monumental mistake!  I've been married 16 years and have learned a few things along the way! JR

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Veteran Advisor

Re: 10-21

Well jr I read your post and I sympathize with you.

Been there, done that.

At times like that you ain't going to do anything right!

So we just have to take the medicine and try again.

Been trying for 40 some years and it is still the same.

Had a note to put the meat in the oven and turn it on at 4 pm.

Put reminder on cell phone and rushed home from a parts run and was 5 minutes late. Now I did not think that was going to be too bad BUT pulled into yard and my dear wife had beat me home.

She did not say anything but oven was on when I came through house.

It was a good pork roast too.

Now I have to go half way back on my parts run to make the other stop I did not have time for.

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