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Honored Advisor

Just a memo

This was an
>> actual memo sent out by IBM to its employees in all seriousness. It went
>> to all field engineers about a computer peripheral problem. The author of
>> this memo was quite genuine. The engineers rolled on the floor!
>> Especially note the last couple of sentences.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> "If a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may
>> need a ball replacement. Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field
>> Replacement Units). Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, a
>> replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by properly trained
>> personnel. Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by
>> examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and
>> harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ depending upon
>> the manufacturer of the mouse.  Foreign balls can be replaced using the
>> pop off method. Domestic balls are replaced by using the twist off
>> method.  Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive.  However,
>> excessive handling can result in sudden discharge.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> "Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately.
>> It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare balls for
>> maintaining optimum customer satisfaction. Any customer missing his balls
>> should contact the local personnel in charge of removing and replacing
>> these necessary items.
>>
>>
>>
>> "Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an
>> unhappy customer."

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Highlighted
Honored Advisor

Re: Just a memo

Definition of the word  "coincidence".
 
A  chicken farmer went to the local bar ....He sat next to a woman and ordered  champagne.
 
The woman said:" How strange, I also just  ordered a glass of champagne".
 
"  What a coincidence " - said the farmer, who added: " It is a special day for me  ..... I'm celebrating"
 
"  It is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating!" said the  woman.
 
"What a coincidence" said the  farmer.
 
While they toasted, the man asked: " What  are you celebrating?"
 
"  My husband and I are trying to have a child for years, and today, my  gynecologist told me that I was pregnant".
 
"What a coincidence!" said the man. " I'm  a chicken farmer and for years all my hens were infertile, but now they are all  set to lay fertilized eggs. "
 
"This is awesome" said the woman. " What  did you do for your chickens to become fertile?"
 
"  I used a different rooster " the farmer said.
 
The woman smiled and said: "What a  coincidence"
 

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Highlighted
Honored Advisor

Re: Just a memo

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Highlighted
Veteran Advisor

Re: Just a memo

Thanks Hobby - marketing page needs some laughs today!!Smiley LOL

 

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Highlighted
Honored Advisor

Re: Just a memo

WARNING since this is a marketing page here it is...

 

MARKET COMMENTARY July 11, 2014

 

By Nathan Schouvieller

 

Unfortunately I have been given the rather unpleasant task of summing up a pretty gloomy marketing week. So here goes, September Corn Futures closed down a total of 31 ¼ cents on the week and the December was down a weekly total of 30 ½. Soybeans followed the same trend with August beans down a total of $1.04 this week and November down a total of 58 ½ cents.

 

Today’s Crop Report capped off the bearish news of the week with production unchanged at 13.86 billion bushels and an average yield of 165.3 bpa. New crop ending stox were increased from 1.726 to 1.801 billion bu and had the highest stox to use ratio in six years at 13.5%. Old crop ending stox increased as well from 1.146 to 1.246 mostly due to a decreased feed usage of 125 mil bu.

 

Fields in the draw are looking really good and if you haven’t started marketing new crop yet it’s time to stop putting it off. If you want some help we are signing up Pro Pricing bushels now and would be happy to discuss it with you and see if it’s a good fit. Premium offers are another great way to add a few cents onto your cash price. If nothing else give us a call and have a conversation about what you have left to market we’re here to help.

 

Have a great weekend. Hopefully the rain holds off and there will be some sunshine to get out and enjoy.

 

 

Cargill Inc.

Eddyville, IA

 

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Veteran Advisor

Re: Just a memo

Thank you hobby.

Do you happen to run accross any memos
About marbles. Several people have informed
Me I may be missing a few. I wonder if
They are twist off style?

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