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Honored Advisor

Motivation???

Am just having trouble finding mine this morning. Call daughter about whether they need me to watch Winn later today..haying drags out into the early evening.

She says she'll get back to me, after SIL checks with his mom...it is her day, but you never know how fast she plans to bolt. Sometimes, she walks out in the middle of daughter's shower, leaving that little boy just standing... Know she loves him, too, but ?!?!?!

Next issue: New guy wants to know about Internet in his house. I do not think that is a necessity, so they can put it through their cell phones, like we have to do out here...no availability for DSL, dialup stinks so bad, last permanent worker stopped using it years ago. Why pay the $50 a month for a landline so we can get a service that doesn't work? She sees the $50... i see the $600 a year, year after year.

Does anyone think they can pay their own luxury freight anymore? Isn't that what we provide for ourselves by working for it?

Last known issue with Jenna's estate is in the closing stages now. Hoping I can get my act together, to finalize the account and send it to the CPA, so her final tax return can be filed and the estate closed.

That has been hanging over me for almost fifteen months, like one more weight on my soul. I can't really talk to Mike about it much...just upsets him more. I need to get it done, but it is sort of he last thing I get to/ have to do for her...so, hard to make myself do, you know?

I think this is part of what's been bringing my spirits down so hard lately. Every time I complete a step in this procss, it feels like one more swipe with an eraser, obliterating the lines of my child's life. I will get to a tiny toehold of peace with this, and then something else makes me feel like I am sliding off that cliff again.

I am glad that my girl is free of her earthly cares and woes. I can see why Heaven is such a great place...forget the streets paved with gold, as long as the mailman can't find you there!

Got to kick it into gear, or another day will just fade away. If anyone has a pep talk or somevpearl of wisdom to share, it would be much appreciated today.

Just need some motivation...!



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Senior Contributor

Re: Motivation???

This sounds normal to me and I know you are a strong woman and will be able to move forward.

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