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Senior Contributor

Re: wondering

we have had projects that weren't ready for fair and didn't go...If the cattle aren't ready, they don't go...it is nobody's fault but the child that didn't work with them enough.  Responsibility is part of raising livestock as well as being a 4H member.  We can push only so much.  I do agree it is time for the kids to kick it into gear and know that in time of family crisis, they need to step up.  And if it means missing out on a favorite activity in order to take care of things at home...so be it.  4H is more than sows, plows and cows!

Senior Contributor

Re: wondering

I got nothing but good thoughts and prayers...and send me your address and I'll send you some wine and cookies because you might need them!  At least the wine (unless you like the hard stuff then I'll send whiskey)  Smiley Very Happy 

 

Don't feel guilty for getting on the grandkids.  They are old enough to help out and why is it so bad for kids to have to "work" as they are growing up anyways?  We all did and didn't turn out too bad I think.  Responsibility at an early age will do more for them in the long run then letting them have "fun" and "be kids" will. 

Advisor

Re: wondering

Hup 2,3,4.   Guide Right and tow that line.    Way to Go Grandma.      Most of the summer was fairly cool to work with cattle.   Could have been working with them in the middle of the day.    Most ball games are in the evening.   If the calves and kids aren't ready... they don't go.     Haul their butts out there.... if they want Grandpa and Grandma's help... they can help you.    Tell family we are going to _______ resturant.   Pick a place with a buffet  that way they can have adequate food.     If they don't like it   they can plan and organize it  and :::::  it will not be at your place or mom's place!      On positive side  it is great that family understands you have to have help with your mom.   

Honored Advisor

Re: wondering

I am sure I am the mean MaMa...other gma gives in on everything, so she can be the favorite. I hinestly think kids want to be guided, not let run amok.

Your son's injuries sound pretty bad. Hope they get him healing soon.
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Senior Contributor

Re: wondering

This will sound strange in today's world where at Wal Mart this week we could hear a family of young boys yelling in the store while running wild. Then at the checkout the mom was yelling louder than the kids while dad appeared quiet. (four young boys and a baby, poor teachers)  In my days of parenting I realized that kids want discipline and guidelines.

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Senior Contributor

Re: wondering

Yesterday they admitted Scott because he has been running a fever.  On IV antibiotics and bloodthinner as they are checking for blood clots.  Of course this is at my DIL's former work place hospital which is an hour away, complicating things more.  Expected to be there through Sunday maybe release Monday.

 

Had the kids of course and I brought down 3 loads of laundry & did here.  DIL is backed up terribly on this with her week but I got my eyes opened even more as I tried to find a place for these clothes.  Not going to go there but honestly, that house is too small for them.  Youngest has a terribly small room which should just be made into a closet if they didn't need it.  She was a "surprise".  And these kids have too many clothes, as most do nowdays.  When mine were small they had Buster Brown shirts & pants, mix & match, for about 7 or 8 days plus some jeans.  Some older farm clothes and that was pretty much it.  Other grandma doesn't help this issue.  Birthdays are at least 6 tops & bottoms plus a toy or two.  And whenever they visit her she buys more.  Wish she could come find a place for all it.

 

I would gladly go up there & help DIL a couple days a month to organize.  Maybe I could sleep at night.

The 4-H projects are partly my DH fault.  We were to get these calves long ago from the fellow who buys our heifers.  One thing after another with the guy and we didn't get them until a week or so ago.  The pig & goat they've had but we don't know much about preparing those animals so not sure if all will go.  So these dairy animals need some adult supervision to help the kids handle them.  Their dad kept pushing but Ronnie was the one doing this purchase and he never pushes.  Not the way a 4-H project should go.

 

Topping it off the oldest grand called the other night wanting to quit his summer job and work for us.  Wouldn't have been a problem when dairying but we told him to work another week, giving them a weeks notice.  We do have some work, but feel this is  the right way to go.  He is not happy but too bad.  I am not happy either lots of days.  LOL

 

 

 

 

 

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Senior Contributor

Re: wondering

How is he doing now?  Burns are pretty major injuries and I would not wish that on anyone.    


When is your fair?   Its so stressful for families at fairtime.  I would agree with Ruby .. if they haven't done the work , the critters don't go.   When our kids were little, we spent a lot of time working with them and their animals as I'm sure your son was and now you are..     Now my kids are either done or are old enough to do it themselves.   They have learned from their own experience and from watching the others that if you don't put the time in at home, you aren't going to win when you get to the fair.   That is part of the learning experience of 4-H and animals, and it does teach them work ethic and I think it makes the win a little sweeter for them.   Right now my youngest has decided she doesn't need to finish up a couple of her arts & crafts projects.   They will be judged Friday morning and I am tired of pushing her.   I think its time for her to have a life lesson - she will be taking the incomplete project and get a white ribbon.  We will not listen to any complaining or excuses after the fact either.     

 

That's a hard one on your grandson wanting to come work for you.    I think you did the right thing tho!

Honored Advisor

Re: wondering

Hiring a kid because his other job didn't work out for him is really dicey. He eventually has to find a place in the outside work world.